How I Work

The Four Relationships And The Gap

How the work is structured, and why it goes where most coaching doesn't.

The Foundation

Why these four

Every leader stewards more than four relationships. But four shape who the leader becomes, what they build, and what they leave behind.

god-icon

01 โ€” With God

Your relationship with God

The relationship that anchors all the others. Lived, felt, day-to-day trust in being loved by Him.

self-icon

02 โ€” With Yourself

Your relationship with yourself

How a leader sees, treats, and leads the person they meet in the mirror. The patterns. The beliefs underneath the behavior.

spouse-icon

03 โ€” With Your Spouse

Your relationship with your spouse

Where every other strength gets tested. Where leadership style either translates into love or doesn't.

team-icon

04 โ€” With Those You Lead

Your relationships with the
people you lead

#2, partners, senior team, board, direct reports. Where Christian formation becomes visible or stays theoretical.

Where the Work Starts

My first question is always the same

"Which of those four has the biggest gap between where it is and where you want it?"

Most leaders answer this in under thirty seconds. The work has two layers.

Surface

Visible

Patterns, dynamics, decisions, conversations. What needs to change.

Root

Underneath

Beliefs underneath behavior. The gap between what the leader knows about God's love and how they actually show up.

Session Icon

Most coaches stay on the visible. Most counselors stay underneath. The work I do moves between them deliberately.

Counseling depth finds the root. Consulting builds the forward strategy. Coaching drives the growth that makes it stick. Depth, direction, momentum โ€” one person, one room, one lens.

The Toolkit

The Tools I Use

The work itself is the relationship. The tools serve the work.

MBTI Step II

How personality shapes each of the four relationships.

EQ-i 2.0

Emotional intelligence when relationships are stuck on feelings, not facts.

CliftonStrengths 34

What a leader is already wired to do well.

SALVES

My own framework for the six core drivers โ€” Security, Acceptance, Love, Value, Enjoyment, Significance โ€” underneath what a leader is optimizing for.

The CHEW Method

Helps Christians lead from stability โ€” where SALVES drivers are met not by performance, but by knowing they are loved by God as much as He loves Jesus.

CliftonStrengths 34

What a leader is already wired to do well.

Structure & Format

The Cadence

Most engagements run 6โ€“12 months at two hours per month. That two hours can be structured flexibly โ€” many clients say they get as much from the shorter laser sessions.

Individual & Couples

1:1 engagements

Two 60-minute sessions or four laser sessions per month. By video or in person near Northlake (off I-285), Atlanta, GA. Email access between sessions.

Marriage Work

Couples engagements

Both spouses present in most sessions; the marriage itself is the primary frame. Or leader-and-spouse format when leadership and marriage are inseparable.

Organizational

Firm engagements

Start with the 3โ€“4 week Discovery Engagement; typically extend into ongoing work for 6โ€“18 months.

business coaching icon

Held confidentially by video or in person at my office near Northlake (off I-285), Atlanta, GA ยท Email access between sessions ยท I take a limited number of engagements to protect depth.

The WORK

Between Sessions

Most of the change happens outside our scheduled time โ€” prayerful review of your patterns, refinement of your Engagement Guide, dedicated deep-thinking time, focused work on your core beliefs, and Session Summary Notes in your private HIPAA-compliant doc within 72 hours of every session.

Quotes

From a Client

What the methodology feels like in practice

Without question, Ryan has been one of the most impactful people in my
life. Whether walking with me through a major career transition from 30
years in medicine into entrepreneurship, or working with me on the personal and family side, he brings tireless compassion, clarity, and strength.

David White, M.D.

Emergency Medical Physician & Entrepreneur

Next Step

Ready to start the conversation?

If you've already started answering the question, the next step is to schedule a complimentary 30-minute call.