The Daily CHEW™
Moving God’s Love from Head to Heart for Christian Professionals
Why This Matters for You
When asked, “Do you love God?,” you would say yes. You serve, you give, you try to obey, you care about truth. But underneath, there can be a quiet question: “Is this real love or just duty, fear, or habit?” In pressured seasons—when you sin again, when prayers seem unanswered, when work and family feel heavy—you may try to crank up your love for God by sheer effort: more disciplines, more resolve, more “I’ll do better this time.” When that inevitably wears thin, you can start to wonder if you are just faking it.
1 John 4 insists that love for God and others is essential evidence of knowing Him, yet it does something crucial: it grounds that love in something prior, something outside you. “We love because he first loved us” (1 John 4:19, ESV). If you silently flip the order—“He loves me because I love Him well enough”—you will either become proud when you seem to be “on fire,” or crushed when you grow cold. Either way, the Great Commandment (“love the Lord your God with all your heart… and your neighbor as yourself,” Matthew 22:37–39) will land on you as a burden rather than as a response.
Under the surface, many high-performing Christians still operate as if their love and devotion keep the relationship secure. In practice, that makes love for God fragile: it rises and falls with your mood, your performance, your sense of success. 1 John 4 offers a different foundation: the Great Commandment rests on the Great Love already given. Until God’s prior, pursuing, one-way love in Christ becomes your starting point, you will always be trying to manufacture love for Him as a project, rather than receiving it as a Spirit-driven response.
The Gospel Meets You Right Here
1 John 4:7–21 is one of the clearest sections in Scripture on the nature of God’s love and how it relates to our love. John begins, “Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God… because God is love” (1 John 4:7–8, ESV). Love does not begin in your heart; it begins in God’s own nature.
He then defines love concretely: “In this the love of God was made manifest among us, that God sent his only Son into the world, so that we might live through him. In this is love, not that we have loved God but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins” (1 John 4:9–10, ESV). Love is not first your devotion, passion, or obedience. It is God sending His Son—at cost to Himself—to give you life and bear your judgment. The order matters:
- “Not that we have loved God…”
- “…but that He loved us and sent His Son…”
Later, John summarizes: “So we have come to know and to believe the love that God has for us. God is love, and whoever abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him” (1 John 4:16, ESV). Notice the sequence: you come to know and believe God’s love, and then you abide in that love. Only then does John say, “We love because he first loved us” (1 John 4:19, ESV). Commentators emphasize that God’s love is prior in time (from eternity), prior in action (sending His Son), and prior in your experience (new birth and the Spirit’s work). Your love is derivative and responsive.
The lie says:
- “God’s love is unlocked or intensified by how much you love Him.”
- “The Great Commandment is primarily a test you must pass to stay in God’s good graces.”
- “If you don’t feel strong love for God, the answer is to try harder, not to receive more deeply.”
The truth says:
- “Love starts with God’s initiative: ‘In this is love, not that we have loved God but that he loved us…’”
- “God’s prior love, shown in sending His Son, is the foundation of any real love you have for Him or for others.”
- “The Great Commandment rests on the Great Love: you can only love God and neighbor because He first loved you.”
Here’s the surprising way God’s love changes this story: instead of treating love for God as something you must generate to prove you belong, you begin to see it as something the Spirit grows in you as you know and believe His prior love in Christ.
- Worship shifts from self-scrutiny (“Do I love You enough?”) to adoration: “This is love—that You loved me and gave Your Son for me.”
- You love God more as you bring your fears, numbness, and mixed motives into the light of His already-given love, asking Him to reshape your heart.
- You love others better because you are no longer using them to earn security or worth; you are free to give the kind of sacrificial love you have received.
Healing of perfectionism and fear, growth in steady affection for God, and strategic clarity about priorities (what really flows from love vs. from pressure) then emerge as fruit of abiding in His love, not as prerequisites for earning it.
CHEW On This™: Practice Moving God’s Love from Head to Heart
Pause at each CHEW step below. Reflect, and answer in your own words—you’ll see a sample below each question. This is where the Gospel gets personal.
Confess
Question:
What are you feeling, fearing, or hiding from God right now about your love for Him (or lack of it)—and how is that affecting the way you relate to others?
Sample answer:
“Father, I feel guilty that I don’t love You the way I think I should. I compare myself to more passionate believers and feel like a fraud. I’m afraid that my lukewarmness means I don’t really know You or that You are less pleased with me. So I try to prove my love through busyness and spiritual activity, but inside I’m tired and resentful. That spills out on my family and team—I get impatient when they don’t match my pace, and I sometimes use them to feel more ‘spiritual’ or effective.”
Prompt:
Take a moment—where do you see yourself in this? Name your honest fears and frustrations about your love for God and how those are shaping your relationships.
Hear
Question:
What does 1 John 4 (and related Scripture) say about God’s love and why you love at all?
Sample answer:
“God, Your Word says, ‘In this is love, not that we have loved God but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins’ (1 John 4:10, ESV). It also says, ‘So we have come to know and to believe the love that God has for us… We love because he first loved us’ (1 John 4:16, 19, ESV). That means my love for You is not the foundation; Yours is. You are not waiting for me to generate love so You can respond. You already loved me first in Christ and You invite me to know and believe that love.”
Prompt:
What verse from 1 John 4:7–21 (or a related passage like Romans 5:8, Ephesians 3:17–19) speaks most directly to your struggle right now?
Exchange
Question:
If I really believed that love is “not that we have loved God but that he loved us,” and that “we love because he first loved us,” how would that change my view of the Great Commandment, my self-criticism, and my relationships right now?
Sample answer:
“If I really believed this, I would stop treating ‘love the Lord your God…’ mainly as a standard I’m failing and start seeing it as a Spirit-enabled response to love already given. I would bring my cool heart to You instead of hiding it. I’d stop using ministry and performance to prove I love You and ask instead, ‘Where do I need to know and believe Your love more deeply?’ With others, I’d become less demanding and more gracious, because I’d remember that their love—for You and for me—also grows out of Your prior love, not out of pressure from me.”
Prompt:
If you believed this deeply, what would change—in your internal dialogue, in your expectations of yourself, and in the way you treat the people you’re called to love?
Walk
Question:
What is one practical step (10 minutes or less) that embodies trust in God’s prior love instead of striving—and helps you love someone in front of you better?
Sample answer:
“Tomorrow morning, instead of jumping straight into my to-do list, I will take 10 minutes to read 1 John 4:9–10 and 4:16–19, and I’ll write out, ‘In this is love: not that I loved God, but that He loved me and sent His Son.’ Then I’ll pray, ‘Help me receive this love and let the love I show today be a response, not a performance.’ As a simple expression, I’ll choose one act of undeserved kindness for a family member or coworker—not to prove anything, but as a way of echoing Your prior love toward me.”
Prompt:
What’s your next move—specific, do-able, rooted in receiving God’s love first and then expressing that love to a real person?
Ways to Experience God’s Love (Real-World Strategies That Change Your Heart)
Here’s how you can actively trust and experience God’s love—not just work harder.
1. Start your day with “He loved first,” not “I must love more”
Why this helps:
Whatever story you wake up into tends to shape your whole day. Beginning with God’s prior love resets the foundation: you are responding, not initiating—freeing you from performance anxiety and making your love for others overflow rather than strive.
How:
- Each morning, read 1 John 4:9–10 or 4:19.
- Out loud, say: “This is love—not that I loved God, but that He loved me first.”
- Briefly thank Him for one concrete way His love has showed up in your life.
Scenario:
On a busy day, instead of thinking, “I need to impress God and everyone else,” you start with, “I am loved first.” You walk into meetings less tense and more available to listen rather than only perform.
What outcomes you can expect:
Your heart slowly learns a new default. Love for God becomes more rooted in gratitude than in fear, and the people around you feel less like props in your bid to “do big things for God.”
2. Let 1 John 4 define what love is, not your feelings or culture
Why this helps:
Without Scripture, “love” becomes whatever you feel or whatever your culture describes. 1 John 4 anchors love in God’s sending, sacrificial action in Jesus. Letting that definition sink in stabilizes your love for God and others when emotions fluctuate.
How:
- Meditate on 1 John 4:9–11: underline verbs like “sent,” “live through Him,” “propitiation.”
- Ask, “What does this show me about how God loves me—concretely?”
- Then ask, “What would it look like to reflect this kind of love toward God and toward one specific person today?”
Scenario:
You see that God’s love moved toward enemies at cost. You respond by choosing to initiate reconciliation with someone you’ve been avoiding, not because you feel like it but because you’re learning love from Him.
What outcomes you can expect:
Your love becomes more resilient and less tied to mood. Others encounter a love that looks more like Christ—patient, sacrificial, truth-telling—rather than a vague niceness.
3. Use a “love audit” to see where you’re living from effort, not from being loved
Why this helps:
Many spiritual activities look loving but are fueled by fear or image management. A gentle audit helps you notice where you’re trying to start the love instead of responding to it.
How:
- List a few key activities: serving, giving, leading, parenting, work rhythms.
- For each, honestly ask: “What drives me most here—fear, pressure, guilt, or remembered love?”
- Invite God to show you one area where He wants to re-root your activity in His prior love.
Scenario:
You realize much of your ministry hustle is driven by fear of failure. You begin to intentionally connect that area to 1 John 4:10–11 in prayer, asking God to rewire your motives.
What outcomes you can expect:
You may keep doing many of the same things, but from a different heart. Over time, others sense less strain and more grace in how you show up.
4. Tie love for God directly to love for the “seen people” around you
Why this helps:
1 John 4 insists that love for God and love for neighbor are inseparable: “he who does not love his brother whom he has seen cannot love God whom he has not seen” (1 John 4:20, ESV). Loving real, imperfect people becomes both the expression and test of the love you claim for God.
How:
- Identify 2–3 “seen people” (family, coworkers, church members) who are hard for you to love.
- Bring them into prayer with 1 John 4:19–21 open, asking God to remind you: “We love because He first loved us.”
- Choose one concrete act of love toward one of them this week (listening, forgiveness, practical help, encouragement).
Scenario:
You feel irritated with a colleague. Instead of venting only to God, you remember that loving them is bound up with loving Him. You ask God for a fresh sense of His prior love for you, then choose to affirm something good in that colleague and offer help.
What outcomes you can expect:
As you practice this, love for God and neighbor stop feeling like separate categories. Your relationships become the primary field where God’s love flows through you, not just concepts you affirm in private.
5. Regularly “chew” on God’s love until it feels personal, not generic
Why this helps:
“We have come to know and to believe the love that God has for us” (1 John 4:16) implies a process—knowing, then believing. CHEWing on specific verses moves “God loves people” to “God loves me, here, in this.”
How:
- Choose one verse from 1 John 4 (e.g., 4:9–10 or 4:16–19).
- Once a week, walk it through CHEW specifically around an area you find hard to believe you’re loved (failure, anxiety, shame).
- Write down what changes in your responses if that love is real right there.
Scenario:
You CHEW 1 John 4:10 over your lingering regret about a past failure. Slowly, you start to believe that “propitiation for our sins” includes that specific sin, and your defensive posture softens.
What outcomes you can expect:
Over time, God’s love becomes more concrete and situationally relevant in your heart. That reality spills into how you counsel yourself and others in their struggles.
6. Let community remind you when you forget who loved first
Why this helps:
In isolation, you will drift back toward effort-first spirituality. Brothers and sisters who know the Gospel can call you back to “He loved first” when you slip into “I must love to stay accepted.”
How:
- Share with a trusted group or friend, “I tend to live like God responds to my love instead of loving me first.”
- Invite them to point it out lovingly when they see you driven by fear, perfectionism, or self-condemnation.
- Receive their reminders of 1 John 4 as part of God’s love for you.
Scenario:
A friend notices you spiraling after a mistake and says, “This sounds like you think God’s love is on the line. Remember—He loved you first.” That interrupts your shame loop and returns you to the Gospel.
What outcomes you can expect:
Community becomes a channel of God’s prior love, not just a place to prove your devotion. You, in turn, become more ready to remind others of the same foundation.
Worship Response: Turn Gratitude into Worship
Take 30 seconds—thank God for what His love has done. Worship is responding to His finished work, even when your feelings lag behind.
Father, thank You that love did not begin with us but with You—that in this is love, not that we have loved You but that You loved us and sent Your Son to be the propitiation for our sins. Thank You that we can say, “We love because He first loved us,” and that every genuine response of love comes from Your prior, pursuing love in Christ. Lord Jesus, thank You for revealing the Father’s heart and making the Great Commandment rest on the Great Love You have already given. Holy Spirit, move this truth from head to heart so that we live as people who know and believe the love God has for us—and from that place love God and others better, with healing, growth, and clarity shining as fruit of Your work, not as proof of ours.
Next Steps to Grow in God’s Love
Lasting change is always relational—God moves, we respond. Share your story, join a CHEW group, or reach out for prayer.
- “Why Everything Begins and Ends with God’s Love in Jesus” – https://1stprinciplegroup.com/why-everything-begins-and-ends-with-gods-love-in-jesus/
Unpacks how all genuine change and obedience rest on God’s prior love in Christ, not on your effort-first spirituality. - “Shame and Identity, Part 8: Chewing on Scripture to Fight Shame” – https://1stprinciplegroup.com/shame-and-identity-part-8-chewing-on-scripture-to-fight-shame/
Guides you in using CHEW with key love-and-identity passages so God’s love becomes personal in the exact places shame and self-effort speak loudest. - “Identity That Won’t Shake: Verses, Practices, and CHEWs to Ground You Beyond Success or Failure” – https://1stprinciplegroup.com/identity-that-wont-shake-verses-practices-and-chews-to-ground-you-beyond-success-or-failure/
Helps you live from a secure, loved identity so that loving God and neighbor becomes a Spirit-empowered response rather than a way to secure your worth.
With you on the journey,
Ryan
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