The Daily CHEW™
Moving God’s Love from Head to Heart for Christian Professionals
You are seated at the kitchen island Tuesday evening with your spouse, the dishes cleared, and the conversation you actually need to have is still not happening. One of you carries the numbers. One of you carries the worry. Neither of you has said the honest thing in weeks, and it is starting to cost something neither of you would name out loud.
I worked with a couple in their early 60s where the husband had a high risk tolerance and the wife had a low one. He would excitedly tell her he was moving a significant portion of their cash reserves to buy a Bitcoin dip — and she, an introvert, would freeze instead of object. He did not notice. She would stop eating and lose weight. After years of this, she finally broke down in tears one evening and stayed broken down for days. That is when he reached out. She felt guilty for not trusting him — and worse, for not trusting God. He felt guilty for bypassing her desire for stability. In our work, they learned to say what was real without judgment, really listen, set up two intentional check-ins a week, and adjust their portfolio so both of them could sleep. Now, when one of them does not share at the check-in, the other gets curious instead of defensive. The unspoken stopped running the marriage. Saturday’s anchor named five money beliefs running Christian high performers’ lives. The marriage is where those beliefs most often collide.
The conversation you have been not having is not really about the dollars. It is about who has been carrying what alone — and what each of you has assumed the other already knew.
“Therefore, having put away falsehood, let each one of you speak the truth with his neighbor, for we are members one of another.” — Ephesians 4:25, ESV. God does not build oneness in a marriage through silence that protects feelings. Scripture reveals that the truth — spoken without judgment and received without defensiveness — is what binds two people back together when money has quietly pulled them apart.
If I really believed God’s love is strong enough to hold both of us and the honest sentence we have been swallowing, how would that change the conversation my spouse and I have not been having about money this week?
This week, schedule one 20-minute check-in with your spouse before Friday. No phones. One open question to start: “What about our money has been on your mind that you have not said out loud?” Then listen. Do not fix. Do not defend. Just listen. If this is the only thing I do from this CHEW today, it is enough.
With you on the journey,
Ryan
Forward this to the person who came to mind while you were reading.
If you had to put this into one sentence for today, what would you say God is inviting you to rest in or return to?
Let's Explore If We're a Fit
If you lead people — at home, on a team, or across an organization — and you want confidential, Gospel-rooted counsel, let's see if we're the right fit.