How to Build Your Own CHEW: A Step-by-Step Walk-Through of Each of the Four Steps

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Four steps. One moment. Because it is already true.

Four Steps. One Moment. Because It’s True.

If you have read What is CHEW?, you know the Core CHEW is one question, thirty seconds, aimed at the moment you are actually in. That’s the on-ramp — the way you learn the muscle.

This is what to do when the moment is bigger. When you need more room to work something through. When thirty seconds isn’t enough and you actually want to sit with the question long enough for Scripture to reach the parts of you that don’t move on the first pass.

The full CHEW walks through four steps: Clarity, Hear, Exchange, Walk. It can take five minutes at a kitchen table with a journal. It can take twenty on a hard morning. It can take forty on a Saturday when you finally have the space to look at the thing you have been carrying all week. There is no right length. There is only the moment in front of you and the question of whether you want to bring Scripture into contact with it.

Here is how each step actually works.

C — Clarity

Father, by Your Spirit, show me what is actually going on in me and what You are saying about it.

Clarity is not analysis. It is not you sitting down with a legal pad to diagnose your own heart. It is asking the Spirit to show you what is underneath.

Most of us start a hard moment already knowing the surface story: the email was unfair, the conversation was hurtful, the decision went badly. Clarity is not about arguing with that story. It is about asking a different question — what is going on in me right now, and what is God saying about it that I have not slowed down to hear?

How to do it: Slow down. Name what happened in one sentence. Then ask the Father, honestly: What is actually going on in me here? What am I bracing against? What am I trying to protect? What am I trying to prove?

Write it down if it helps. Say it out loud if you are alone. Whatever it takes to get past the surface story to the thing underneath the story.

What you’re listening for: a specific emotion, a specific fear, a specific belief you are running on that you did not notice you were running on. Not a paragraph. A sentence. I am afraid he thinks I’m incompetent. Or, I am angry because she did not defend me. Or, I am carrying shame from something I said this morning.

Clarity is honest naming. Not clever naming. Not spiritual-sounding naming. The plain thing that is true.

H — Hear

What has Scripture said about God’s love in the exact place I am reaching?

Hear is where you stop reaching for God’s love as an idea and start reaching for what He has already said about it — on the exact ground you’re standing on.

This is not find a verse that makes you feel better. It is the other direction. You have named a specific place in Clarity — a specific fear, anger, shame, or lie. Hear asks: where does Scripture speak into this exact place? What has God already said about His love in this territory?

How to do it: Take what you named in Clarity and ask: what has God said about His love that speaks directly to this? Then go find those verses. Not to prove a point. To hear them.

If you named fear that you are not enough for the people you lead, you might land in Romans 8:31–39 — no accusation stands against those God has justified, no separation from His love is possible. If you named anger that no one defended you, you might land in Psalm 27:10 or Isaiah 49:15–16. If you named shame from what you said this morning, you might land in Micah 7:19 or 1 John 1:9.

What you’re doing: reading it slowly. Not skimming. Reading it as if God is saying it into the specific place you just named — because He is. Underneath every verse about God’s love is the same reality Jesus prays over you in John 17:23: the Father has loved them, even as He has loved Me. Same love. Right where you are.

Sit with it until at least one line hits differently than it did when you sat down. That is the Word doing what the Word does.

E — Exchange

Because that is true, what shifts right now?

Exchange is the pivot. It is where you take what you named in Clarity, what you heard from Scripture in Hear, and hold them together in front of the Father with one honest question: if that is true — the way Scripture says it is — what shifts in me right now?

This is the same “Because” that runs through the Core CHEW question. It does not ask you to feel a shift. It does not ask you to make a shift. It asks you to reckon with something Scripture already says is true, and to notice — honestly — what changes.

How to do it: Hold the verse you heard in Hear beside the thing you named in Clarity. Then ask, slowly: Because this is true — because God has loved me with the same love He has for His Son, in this exact place — what changes?

You might notice the fear does not have the same weight. You might notice the anger has an edge taken off it. You might notice shame you were carrying you did not know you were carrying. You might notice that a decision you were bracing against does not need to be braced against — because your identity was never on the line in the first place.

What you’re not doing: forcing an insight. Faking a feeling. Rushing to closure. The Exchange is not a technique. It is standing honestly in front of what Scripture says is true and letting the Spirit do what only He does — press it from your head into your heart. Sometimes it lands in ninety seconds. Sometimes you sit there for ten minutes before anything moves. Both are fine.

When something does shift, name it. Out loud or on paper. I don’t need to prove I’m competent — He loves me here regardless. Or, I am angry, and He has not left me — I don’t have to fix her heart to be safe. Or, The shame from this morning was already carried at the cross.

That is the Exchange. Not a bigger feeling. A truer footing.

W — Walk

One small step that cements what the Exchange revealed, grounded in Scripture.

Walk is where the Exchange leaves your head and lands in your day. It is not a resolution. It is a specific next action — small, concrete, and grounded in what just shifted.

The trap here is the vague spiritual commitment. I will trust God more. I will love my wife better. Those are aspirations, not steps. A Walk is the first specific, doable thing that would only make sense because the Exchange is true.

How to do it: Ask, if what just shifted in the Exchange is actually true, what is the first thing I do next? Make it small enough to happen in the next hour, and specific enough that you would know whether you did it.

If Clarity was I am afraid he thinks I’m incompetent, and Hear brought Romans 8, and the Exchange was I don’t have to prove my worth on this call — the Walk might be: send the shorter version of the email, without the paragraph defending yourself. That’s it. One paragraph deleted.

If Clarity was I am angry she did not defend me, and Hear brought Psalm 27:10, and the Exchange was I am not abandoned — He has not left me — the Walk might be: don’t bring the grievance up tonight. Ask her about her day first. One sentence you don’t say. One sentence you do.

If Clarity was I am carrying shame from something I said this morning, and Hear brought Micah 7:19 or 1 John 1:9, and the Exchange was the shame was already carried — the Walk might be: text a short, honest apology. No context. No defense. Send it before you overthink it.

Grounded in Scripture: The Walk always echoes what Hear said. It is not a random act of will. It is what obedience looks like because a specific truth about God’s love just landed. Faith without corresponding action stays a doctrine. The Walk is where the doctrine touches the ground you are actually standing on.

A Full Example, Start to Finish

Say it’s Thursday afternoon. A colleague sent an email that felt like a public correction in front of your team. You have been off all day since — sharper on a call, quieter in a meeting, checking your phone too often. You finally have twenty minutes. You sit down.

Clarity. You slow down and ask honestly: what is actually going on in me? The surface answer is he embarrassed me. Underneath is something older: I am afraid this is what people actually think of me. That I’m sloppy. That I don’t belong at this level. That is the naming.

Hear. You go looking for what Scripture has said about God’s love in the place where you are questioning whether you belong. Romans 8:31–39 lands. Nothing separates you from His love. No accusation stands. You read it slowly. You reread verse 33 — who shall bring any charge against God’s elect? It is God who justifies. Something in the accusation lifts an inch.

Exchange. You hold the two together. Because it is God who justifies me — because His love for me right now is the same love He has for His Son — what changes? You notice: the email did not decide whether you belong at this level. It felt that way for three hours. But it does not have that authority. What Scripture has already said does.

Walk. You write a short, non-defensive reply. You do not include the sentence explaining yourself. You do not cc anyone. You address what he asked and offer to talk it through in person if he wants. You hit send before you edit it again.

That was one CHEW. Maybe fifteen minutes. It did not solve the workplace. It did not change your colleague. But you moved through the rest of the afternoon differently — because Scripture reached the actual place the wound was, and you stood there long enough for it to land.

When to Do the Full CHEW vs. the Core CHEW

The Core CHEW is for the ordinary moments — the driveway, the inbox, the pause before a hard reply. Thirty seconds. One question. That is enough because the moment is small enough for one honest reach at Scripture.

The full four-step CHEW is for the moments that need more room:

• Something you have been carrying for days that you finally want to look at honestly
• A hard conversation you are preparing for
• A decision that has been sitting on your chest
• A sin pattern you keep noticing and want to bring into the light
• A repeating fear or shame that keeps showing up in the same places
• A morning you have twenty minutes and you want to actually use them

You do not have to choose one or the other. You need both. Most days will be Core CHEWs woven through your ordinary — the practice you learned in the 7-Day Challenge. Some days will be a full CHEW at your kitchen table, on a walk, or in your journal. Both are the same practice. Just at different scales.

One Last Thing

You do not need to do this perfectly. You do not need a journal. You do not need silence and candles. You do not need to feel spiritual before you start.

You need to be honest, and you need Scripture, and you need thirty seconds to twenty minutes. That is the whole practice. Everything else is decoration.

Because God loves you as much as He loves Jesus, and that is true whether the CHEW lands cleanly or messily. It is true whether you feel it today or not. What you are doing when you CHEW is not conjuring truth. You are standing on it.

Now go pick a moment.

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New to CHEW? Start with What is CHEW? →

Want the doctrine underneath this? Read When God’s Love Finally Becomes Real →

Coaching, counseling, or working with Ryan? See How I Work →

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With you on the journey,

Ryan

This content was developed with the assistance of AI tools. All materials are prayerfully guided, reviewed, and refined to reflect our biblical convictions, voice, and commitment to Christ-centered truth. AI supports clarity and efficiency — not authority or spiritual guidance.